Today is my 32nd birthday and it is hard to believe that you will someday know what this feels like. Especially as you wiggle and whine next to me right now. Ouch! You just pinched my arm because you don't know what I am doing that does not feel focused on you. You are tired and need a little nap- you have a tough time admitting it lately. You have been salivating like crazy and gagging when you eat. We think it might be more teeth but they have not shown themselves.
I wish I could take a picture of the scene right now. I am typing with one hand as I breastfeed you and you are kicking your legs around to stop me from whatever I am doing. One hand typing is slow. So, I will be brief.
I was sad last night about getting older today. I don't think I have ever felt that way before. It just occurred to me something that will be tough for you to understand as a man. I was once the prettiest girl in the room. I knew that often I really was. That sounds very vain so I apologize but it is just one of those things a girl feels. Now, at 25 pounds overweight, with acne on my face because I am not taking birth control and glasses that I have to wear all the time and hair I don't have time to get done and clothes I picked because they were comfortable--I'm just not audacious anymore. I still have flare but it has changed from my look to my personality. This is a hard realization but one I am sure every woman comes to.
Anyway--my life is so rich. I am so glad what God has given me in life so far and can't wait to see what He gives me next. I get to snuggle you all morning then have to go to work. But then I am off next week to be with you. I will write you a letter then!
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