a sweet, sweet sound in my ear

These last few days have been the usual in some ways- lots of snuggles, head bumps, time outs, trips to tickle town, etc. Just the usual heaven substitute.

But last night, when I was holding you Charlie in your room above your bed, something magical happened. I always let you give your puppy a snuggle and then we toss him in your bed. Then I hold you so that I am looking down at your face in the crook of my arm while I pray and look at your face and tell you I love you. Last night, you were smiling at me as I talked quietly. Then, with perfect love in your face, you gently reached up your hand to my cheek then touched my mouth and my nose and said clearly, “m ma-ma.” Then you smiled really big. I can’t tell you what that moment felt like to me because it is unparalleled. I just froze in that moment and kept looking at you trying to memorize your little face. Thank you Charlie. You are such a sweet little baby. I am just in awe of my love for you.
You are really interacting with language right now- saying, “mooo, ack (for Jack), baa, night night, bye bye (to anyone), no no ( not as fun), bay-ba (baseball)” You made a cute attempt at ‘butt paste’.

We had a tough afternoon with lots of struggles from both of you- and I don’t feel like talking about that. What I do want to remember is the morning. We had breakfast, but before we eat every single meal- Jack you sing, “ we need to pray before we eat ta-tuh” You made it up- and you remember it on your own. After breakfast, I pushed you both in the stroller to the elementary school where we are going to be attending a preschool readiness classroom called Learning Link. It is going to be ideal for creating routine, learning to follow rules and me being with you while it is happening as opposed to church. It went well today- you both tried things, interacted with others, manipulated things that you are not used to and followed directions. Then we walked home and played and ran around the park on the way home. Then we had lunch in the middle of the backyard. When we prayed, I said, “and thank you God for this wonderful moment right now.” I looked down at you Jack and you smiled a beaming smile back at me. Again- sigh. Then I was watering the plants which turned into filling my hammock with water and we all got soaking wet splashing. Oh- if all life were like that morning—we’d accidentally think this was heaven. Don’t worry- the afternoon reminded me that this is still a broken planet.